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'I love my job, *and* my new medication'
'Go ahead, piss me off. I think there's room for one more body.'
'It's hard to be nostalgic when you can't remember anything'
'Dyslexics have more fnu'
'Curiosity? Nope. Got that particular cat with the lawnmower...'
'How come when women do it, it's "independence", but when I do it, it's "fear of commitment"?'
'Sometimes you're the windshield. Sometimes you're the bug.'
'You! Out of the gene pool!'
'If you can hear them whining, you're not pressing hard enough on the pillow'
'Give Pizza Chants'
'Does the name "Pavlov" ring a bell?'
'Half the people reading this are below average'
'Not tonight, dear, I have a modem...'
'Just who is this Didley Squat guy, and what's the big deal with me not knowing him?'
'Wanted: Schroedinger's Cat. Dead Or Alive.'
'Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines'
'If you're not part of the solution, you're part of the precipitate'
'ZenCrafters: Total Enlightenment in about an hour'
'Corduroy pillows: They're making headlines!'
'When cryptography is outlawed, only outlaws jgwh hwhrula kalyq majgsatd'

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