Donning my haz-mat suit I waddled out to the Garage Mahal, and surveyed the situation inside. All seemed in order, but, then, I just barely spied a puddle of some sort under a car. Bending down, there it was, a nice, warm, sticky, dark golden in color. Was it some strange foreign substance? Naw, this isn’’t just some Morgan or MGA were taking about...and besides, when the MGB’s coil exploded, the pool of PCBs were a dark nasty looking brown and the paint on the floor was bubbling ferociously. No, this was likely common 15W40 oil, though, perhaps one of the dogs had recently peed there. It did look more like pee than syrup. Glancing over at the dog, now lying spread-eagle on my car cover, I thought, naw, a kidney infection was not likely, the lab looked bright-eyed and bushy tailed, ‘ol Bruce is fine. Could it be oil? Taking no chances, I immediately, scraped it up and sent it to Stanford, to check the viscosity, zinc, and virus content.

Approaching with caution, I opened the hood carefully. To my surprise, absolutely no black walnuts on the manifolds. Unusual. A bad sign... if the squirrels had stayed away all winter, this was likely Ukranian oil. But, how could this be, I don’t even own a Trabant or a Geiger counter. Puzzling. But, then, what was that stuff all over the place by steering gear? I tasted it. Yeeeach. Not Aunt Jamima, Too much salt. I got out my super-duper Harbor Fright Mini-Sun Forever work light. It didn’t work. Oblivious to the ever-present fuel odor, I lit a candle. Minimal explosion, hardly worth mentioning.

Yup, the valve cover gasket had given up the ghost. Maybe the bolt was just loose. I grabbed my Harbor Fright Super-Duper Mini-Torque wrench and very carefully tightened the Phillips-head screw to a 6.0 FT-LBS, plus or minus 5.5 or so. That oughta do it. I started it up. Jeeez, those Rochester units love to sit all winter. It stared quickly, probably only had to crank it 13 minutes. Never knew a battery could register negative volts (As checked with my Harbor Fright Super Super Duper Mini Meter) .

Ah, the sound of those badly adjusted oil-less tappets is just like music.(80’s Rap), as the high-idle cam stuck with the motor turning a cool 2500 RPM. Think the oil might be flowing now. As the mill screamed toward 3500 RPM, I shut her down. Ran on for, oh, say 48 seconds. Examining the valve cover carefully, I notice a new stream of that lovely golden stew of hydrocarbons. Shucks (verbiage cleaned up considerably here) Surgery would be necessary. Carefully removing all kinds of crap, (Air cleaner, miscellaneous parts of the air meter, and more), I finally got all for screws out of the valve cover and wiggled the cover out. Gasket in pieces, no wonder it leaks.

Now, after all this, the critical question for all my Corvette aficionado friends: how, (other than glueing the valve cover down and preventing all further tappet adjustments), do I put this thing back on in a way that it doesn’t leak. I think the use of flexible valve covers, with difficult to align gaskets, rounded sealing surfaces, and four randomly spaced bolts was just genius, don’t you?

 

I've had really good luck with the Fel-Pro gasket, but they're certainly not "correct".

 

Thanks, NCRS judges don’t much like puddles of oil under the car either Correct is not really a concern, no judging for this car.

 

I will second the Fel-Pro gaskets.

 

For a valve cover gasket that will never leak, use what ever they use on a crate 350 motor.
I wanted to install my nice alum Corvette covers so I took a screw driver to the OEM covers. Then a light tap with a small hammer, then my 18" pry bar, then two pry bars and in no time at all I had the covers off!
I am sure that they would never have leaked. (and they will never leak in the future as they were completely destroyed.

 

The cork ones are tricky bastards. I learned to torque the bolts just as tight as I could with a big 'ol Phillips, (not a very technical term, I understand, one I rarely specified on a AIM document when I was a GM engineer) run the car a bit, then repeat on the still-hot engine. Many times that worked, except before judging and PV, so I could burn every finger on both hands wiping up the preliminary leakage.

I'm looking for the definitive, foolproof, solution, the one I'm not bright enough to invent. I managed to invent cover bolts that align themselves every time without cross-threading, somebody else out there has to have Bubba'd his way to the perfect sealing technique

Mike

 

Mike-
I've got 9 different V8 engines including my 396 Corvette, so I've struggled with valve cover sealing a long, long time, still do. I have a 365 Caddy that is hard. 4 screws per cover don't seal ****. It is really important to make sure the cover mating surfaces are straight and if not straightened. Otherwise you are wasting your time. I pull my covers, I make sure they are straight, I use cork gaskets mostly, rubber on motors where it works, and I use RTV. And...I don't over-tighten. I seem to get decent results, but eventually they leak - just as they did back in their day. These are not Toyota or Mercedes engine blocks and covers after all.

Main thing is, straight covers first and foremost, don't over-tighten. And remember these are old Chevrolets.

Dan

 

Thanks Dan, as a past Cadillac fastening engineer, I will not take credit for the Cadillac cover leaking. It's not my fault, operator error, I'm sure.

I just don't like my white floor having all these tire marks, oil, gear lube, trans fluid, and antifreeze puddles. I'm not good with a mop, I need to sue somebody.

I'm OK with the coffee stains.

Mike

 

I'm sympathetic to the mop or at least the use of one. I avoid them. I did this garage in epoxy just for that reason. Only thing that can hurt it is battery acid. It makes cleanup easy but mandatory. With a garage like this you can't leave oil, ATF, gear lube, coolant and stale gasoline laying around. It's unbecoming. Back when I was broke and had only my 63 Impala in a 1 car garage with a cement floor I never even looked under the car. So much for success. Now it's, "holy **** there's some petro-olium on the freaking floor" and off I run for my spray bottle of 70-20 Simple Green and micro-fiber towel designated as such but which has been recently repurposed as a virus defence mechanism. So those spoiled cars of mine better fuc&ing contain themselves until this is over.

Dan

 

Not that it helps any, but I purchased a 69 Chevelle, new, with the 350/300 hp engine. One side leaked a bit, so trusting myself more than the dealer mechanic, I removed that cover (orange, stamped steel) in the first 6 months. To my surprise the gasket was a rubber construction and one of the fasteners had cut the edge apparently at installation (Tonawanda engine). I make my way to the parts counter and they only had cork, nothing else in the book. I think I bought a Felpro rather than cork, but apparently the assembly plant used a gasket not serviced. After over 100k miles, the original on the other side never leaked or weeped a drop. The Felpro weeped a bit. I’ve never yet seen another VC gasket like what I saw on that head, nor met any parts person that did either.

 

Hah! Grey is child's play. Try white!!!!

 

I hate a show off.

 

Nice sentiment, Don, I could spill some oil on the floor, if you like. I was just showing off your wheels on the black car...

 

that car did catch my eye. I thought those wheels looked mint. Now I know why. I've spent time in hospital rooms that were filthy compared to your car shed.

 

Nice Caddy, by the way, love the color. We used to have a car show at Cadillac engineering. Some of the cars that would show up were amazing, the early 30's V16 cars were spectacular...

 

Yeah, if I wasn't so far from Detroit, I'd expect a call from the Feds looking for hospital space. Hope you're doing well down there, getting a bit cabin feverish here in the north country.

 

That looks real nice, but is that snow I see outside up to the windows?

 

Mr. VTrocious - if you have a small block, your answer is these:

I had the same problem with perennially leaking aluminum valve covers. The cork gaskets just don't seal for long. These blue Fel-Pro babies have been on my engine for four years with nary a leak.

Now you can chase the other leaks that are getting onto your squeaky clean garage floor!

 

I've used (and, currently using) FelPro 1604 gaskets. Be sure the valve cover edges are perfectly straight, don't over torque the valve cover bolts. Mine don't weep or seep at all...and, I drive mine...a lot.

 

No snow here now, but this is my favorite vehicle in winter: