Dear Abby,

I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice on what could be a crucial decision. I've suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs... phone rings but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently although when I ask their names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them." I always stay awake to look out for her taxi coming home, but she always walks down the drive. Although I can hear a car driving off, as if she has gotten out of the car round the corner. Why? Maybe she wasn't in a taxi? I once picked her cell phone up just to see what time it was and she went berserk and screamed that I should never touch her phone again and why was I checking up on her. Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her. I decided I was going to park my C3 Corvette next to the garage and then hide behind it so I could get a good view of the whole street when she came home. It was at that moment, crouching behind my Corvette, that I noticed that my engine seemed to be leaking a little oil. Is this something I can fix myself or should I take it to a mechanic?

Thanks.
Anonymous

 

ROTFLMFAO!

That's Excellent!

 

The Vette ALWAYS comes first!!!

 

if is wasnt leaking would you think that you were out of fluid?.....



as for the wife....hmmm.... send her on a week vacation and then move her out while shes gone........ but put the vette in a safe location before hand...


b

 

that joke has been going round and round here...

http://forums.corvetteforum.com/show...ht=phone+rings

 

it may have been going round and round but its the first time
i have seen it

 

 

I didn't see it. It was too good to pass up.

 

Dear Abby:

I plan to marry soon and I have some family issues that I need
your advice on.

I am a non prescription herbal distributor in Athens who has recently been diagnosed as a carrier of a well known and rather nasty virus. My parents
live in the Atlanta suburb of Duluth and one of my sisters, who lives in
Valdosta, is married to a transvestite.

My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing natural
herbs and are currently dependent on my other two sisters, who
are now in Nigeria to open a new internet based investment company.

I have two brothers. One is currently serving a no-parole life
sentence in the Georgia Diagnostic Center in Jackson concernig
a teenage boy in 1992. The other brother is currently in jail
awaiting trial on charges of misconduct with his nephews.

I have recently become engaged to marry a former Russian prostitute
who lives in Macon and is still a part time "working girl" at a very nice
truck stop on I-75.

All things considered, my main problem is this: I love my fiance
and look forward to bringing her into the family, and I certainly
want to be totally honest with her - should I tell her about my
cousin who is a Clemson fan?

Signed,
Worried About My Reputation

 

 

Too funny!!! Can't chase mine off with a sharp stick!!!Muddy

 

Dear Anonymous,

If it isn't leaking something, it isn't a Vette. So you think your wife is a lesbian?

 

Im Getting ready to get married but my future wifes sister keeps giving me the eye well the other day when no one was home but me and her she said lets go upstairs and threw her panties at me well I ran out side as fast as I could and there was all my future father inlaw and mother in law and my future wife all saying how good I did Hell thank god I kept my rubbers in the car!!!!!!!!

 

Oh my GAWD that's funny. Rubbers in the car. I'd have punched 'ol father in law for that, and slapped the new mom...

 

Perfect

 

She got a good job? if so Don't worry about it...gotta get some cash together to fix the vette that's what's important

 

hahahahha... that was funny!!!!

 

I read that to my girlfriend, and she smacked me in the back of head and said that wasn't funny. I did chuckle again after she left...(Mind control is great.)