Vette vs Volvo
Safety Car
Joined: May 2001
Posts: 3,758
Likes: 3
From: Surrey
Re: Vette vs Volvo (Beer)
Friggin Volvas. I hate those station wagons (4 wheeled Panzers). The 240's are the worst, they should come standard with windshield stickers saying "SORRY MATE, I DIDN'T SEE YOU". What is it with them? Have they got mirrored glass fitted in the side windows.... the wrong way round? Why is it, that 9 times out of 10, if a car has pulled out in front of another vehicle it's usually a Volva station wagon: "sorry mate, I didn't see you".
And now they're dropping powerful engines into them so you can't even outrun the homicidal crazies driving them. I reckon Vulva buyers are the type of people that used to break their Tonka toys within a week of getting them at Xmas. There must be a very good reason for somebody's main reason for choice of car being "because it's safe". Could it be coz that person is a dangerous driver, a menace on the road, far more of a threat to fellow road users than WMD's? "I haven't had an accident in the whole 10 years I've had my 240, but I've seen hundreds".
If I see a pair of rectangular headlights heading towards me on a dark country road at night it's invariably a 240 & it'll probably be on my side of the road because the driver will be doing her knitting, or pondering over a clue in the Times crossword with the front seat passenger. You don't drive Volva station wagons, you just steer them around immovable objects like 500 year old oak trees & Cathedrals. Everything else just has to get out of your way.
After over 2 decades of near misses I'm convinced that my last sight on this planet will be of the side of an industrial blue Vulva 240 station wagon with scuffed bumpers. And it'll have those tedious stickers in the back saying "Child on Board" or "Caution: Show Dogs in Transit" (never "Extreme Caution: Volvo"). And it'll probably have one of those stupid toy poodles sitting on the drivers lap while she's stroking it & doing her makeup at the same time :(
Oh yeah, some of the new ones are fast. The 740 was quick & has started off a mad craze for fast Volvas. Don't race them. If they can't beat you then there's a high chance that they'll try to run you off the road (it'll just be another trophy scuff on the bumper for them).
I've not got anything against the car itself. They're reliable, spacious, safe ( :mad ) & look boring. Fantastic cars for the Caravan & Camping Club members. But they do something to some people that climb into the drivers seat. A little old lady, who's hobbies include flower arranging & singing in the church choir, can turn into a venomous, spitting ball of hate & crazed dementia when behind the wheel.
Even SUV drivers treat them with respect (the same sort of respect you'd have if you woke up to find a rabid siberian tiger in your bathroom).....
:cheers:
And now they're dropping powerful engines into them so you can't even outrun the homicidal crazies driving them. I reckon Vulva buyers are the type of people that used to break their Tonka toys within a week of getting them at Xmas. There must be a very good reason for somebody's main reason for choice of car being "because it's safe". Could it be coz that person is a dangerous driver, a menace on the road, far more of a threat to fellow road users than WMD's? "I haven't had an accident in the whole 10 years I've had my 240, but I've seen hundreds".
If I see a pair of rectangular headlights heading towards me on a dark country road at night it's invariably a 240 & it'll probably be on my side of the road because the driver will be doing her knitting, or pondering over a clue in the Times crossword with the front seat passenger. You don't drive Volva station wagons, you just steer them around immovable objects like 500 year old oak trees & Cathedrals. Everything else just has to get out of your way.
After over 2 decades of near misses I'm convinced that my last sight on this planet will be of the side of an industrial blue Vulva 240 station wagon with scuffed bumpers. And it'll have those tedious stickers in the back saying "Child on Board" or "Caution: Show Dogs in Transit" (never "Extreme Caution: Volvo"). And it'll probably have one of those stupid toy poodles sitting on the drivers lap while she's stroking it & doing her makeup at the same time :(
Oh yeah, some of the new ones are fast. The 740 was quick & has started off a mad craze for fast Volvas. Don't race them. If they can't beat you then there's a high chance that they'll try to run you off the road (it'll just be another trophy scuff on the bumper for them).
I've not got anything against the car itself. They're reliable, spacious, safe ( :mad ) & look boring. Fantastic cars for the Caravan & Camping Club members. But they do something to some people that climb into the drivers seat. A little old lady, who's hobbies include flower arranging & singing in the church choir, can turn into a venomous, spitting ball of hate & crazed dementia when behind the wheel.
Even SUV drivers treat them with respect (the same sort of respect you'd have if you woke up to find a rabid siberian tiger in your bathroom).....
:cheers:
Safety Car
Joined: Jan 2000
Posts: 4,143
Likes: 0
Re: Vette vs Volvo (Jay M)
Funny story.... :lol:
As for Volvos......I don't care how fast they are or how fast they can be ~ they'll never have that :cool: image that a vette has. :p:
I've had Hondas, Volvos, BMWs, Toyotas, and many others wanting to race me........never took the bait ~ it wasn't worth the effort of even pushing the pedal 1/2" lower. :lol:
IF (while there's no proof) I decided to race or accept a challenge - it's an Historic event of Magnamonious proportions leaving victims everywhere choking on tire smoke & breathing carcenogenic exhaust fumes ! :reddevil
......but, like I said there's no proof of this occurence. :jester
Anyways......I just put around in my Big Block.
Funny how people are now too shy to challenge since I'm running straight loud pipes. :jester :lol: :jester
As for Volvos......I don't care how fast they are or how fast they can be ~ they'll never have that :cool: image that a vette has. :p:
I've had Hondas, Volvos, BMWs, Toyotas, and many others wanting to race me........never took the bait ~ it wasn't worth the effort of even pushing the pedal 1/2" lower. :lol:
IF (while there's no proof) I decided to race or accept a challenge - it's an Historic event of Magnamonious proportions leaving victims everywhere choking on tire smoke & breathing carcenogenic exhaust fumes ! :reddevil
......but, like I said there's no proof of this occurence. :jester
Anyways......I just put around in my Big Block.
Funny how people are now too shy to challenge since I'm running straight loud pipes. :jester :lol: :jester
Thread Starter
Drifting
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 1,600
Likes: 0
From: Valencia (near LA) CA
Re: Vette vs Volvo (UKPaul)
ROTFLMAO! :rofl:
Some of my favorite lines:
Some of my favorite lines:
The 240's are the worst, they should come standard with windshield stickers saying "SORRY MATE, I DIDN'T SEE YOU".
And now they're dropping powerful engines into them so you can't even outrun the homicidal crazies driving them
After over 2 decades of near misses I'm convinced that my last sight on this planet will be of the side of an industrial blue Vulva 240 station wagon with scuffed bumpers. And it'll have those tedious stickers in the back saying "Child on Board" or "Caution: Show Dogs in Transit" (never "Extreme Caution: Volvo"). And it'll probably have one of those stupid toy poodles sitting on the
If I see a pair of rectangular headlights heading towards me on a dark country road at night it's invariably a 240 & it'll probably be on my side of the road
Racer
Joined: Aug 2001
Posts: 473
Likes: 0
From: Raleigh NC
Re: Vette vs Volvo (Jay M)
I wish I still had the link, but there was a Volvo on ebay a few months back that was actually very cool. The ultimate sleeper. It was a 240D (yes, as in diesel) that had a ZZ4 in it. The guy had also dropped in a TH350 and new rear end in it. The car looked perfectly stock accept that the rear tires were slightly wider.
Someone posted the link here saying that you could pick it up for not much more than the cost of the ZZ4. Anybody see it?
Someone posted the link here saying that you could pick it up for not much more than the cost of the ZZ4. Anybody see it?
