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That solenoid is the replacement for the original. But, the new one is no match for the original, as far as quality is concerned. It will function just as well; the only purpose of that solenoid/valve is to dump oil pressure when turned on. But, how long the new one will last may be the issue.
That metal gasket is only a one-time use gasket. It crushes those embossed circles upon assembly and won't seal quite as well on another part. If you can't find a new metal gasket, you should just reuse the old one (rather than to have no gasket). And NO, you can't use silicone sealant instead! This is high pressure fluid...hence the need for the metal gasket.