Microsoft vs GM
Thread Starter
Melting Slicks
Joined: Aug 2003
Posts: 3,306
Likes: 5
Microsoft vs GM
I know this doesn't belong here, but since everyone is so laid back and cool in this section I figured you'd guys enjoy a good laugh to break up the day. If this is a repost, I'm sorry. I haven't seen it before so surely someone else hasn't either.
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."
In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part):
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash now and then.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart! it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6. The oil, water, temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation!" warning light.
7 . The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
- Unknown
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."
In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics (and I just love this part):
1. For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash now and then.
2. Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart! it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6. The oil, water, temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation!" warning light.
7 . The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
8. Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
10. You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
- Unknown
Melting Slicks
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 3,418
Likes: 1
From: Chicagoland Area IL
I heard a similar version about 5-7 years ago. But it was, if cars where like silicon we would do 0-60 in a millisecond and get 1000 miles to gallon. Author, I don’t know but maybe Moore (as in Moore’s law).
Here’s another one if combustion temperatures can be raised by 50% then Brayton cycle (jet engine) will be more efficient then Otto cycle.
It’s all in technology, I am still surprised how well LSx does by comparison to multivalve (3+) overhead cam engines.
Mike
Here’s another one if combustion temperatures can be raised by 50% then Brayton cycle (jet engine) will be more efficient then Otto cycle.
It’s all in technology, I am still surprised how well LSx does by comparison to multivalve (3+) overhead cam engines.
Mike
Team Owner
Joined: Jul 2002
Posts: 37,048
Likes: 69
From: This city NEVER sleeps! Frank's back yard!
Originally Posted by BlackMagicC5
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart! it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.
I can just see it now - soon, the damn car will pull itself of the road, kill itself, and restart itself, never 'bothering' the driver with such pedestrian issues as driving!
