Keep them coming
Corvette Joke
Le Mans Master
Joined: Oct 2007
Posts: 6,868
Likes: 770
From: Kelso Washington
St. Jude Donor '09, '13, '15
From this forum in 2005....
The couple had been debating the purchase of a new auto for weeks. He wanted a C5. She wanted a faster and smaller sports car so she could zip through traffic around town. He would probably have settled on any Vette, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range.
"Look " she said, "I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in 9 seconds or less. And my birthday is coming up. You should surprise me."
Soooo, for her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom scale.
The couple had been debating the purchase of a new auto for weeks. He wanted a C5. She wanted a faster and smaller sports car so she could zip through traffic around town. He would probably have settled on any Vette, but everything she seemed to like was way out of their price range.
"Look " she said, "I want something that goes from 0 to 200 in 9 seconds or less. And my birthday is coming up. You should surprise me."
Soooo, for her birthday, he bought her a brand new bathroom scale.
Racer
Joined: Jun 2012
Posts: 459
Likes: 1
From: LAUREL MD
Joke
2 hick brothers go to a lumber yard to buy some lumbar. No place to park so the smarter brother drives the little Isuzu pickup around the block while the other goes in to order.
Clerk: How can I help you?
Hick: Wanna buy some 4 by 2s.
Clerk: You must mean 2 by 4s?
Hick: Wait, I’ll go ask my Brother (goes outside to flag brother down) and back in. Yes 2 by 4s.
Clerk: How many?
Hick: 200.
Clerk: (Who saw the little Isuzu P/U as it went past) and asked amazed you sure you want 200?
Hick: Wait, I’ll go ask my Brother (back outside and back in) you are right I want 20.
Clerk: How long you want them?
Hick: I’ll go ask my Brother (outside and back in) we want them for a long time we’re building a barn.
Clerk: How can I help you?
Hick: Wanna buy some 4 by 2s.
Clerk: You must mean 2 by 4s?
Hick: Wait, I’ll go ask my Brother (goes outside to flag brother down) and back in. Yes 2 by 4s.
Clerk: How many?
Hick: 200.
Clerk: (Who saw the little Isuzu P/U as it went past) and asked amazed you sure you want 200?
Hick: Wait, I’ll go ask my Brother (back outside and back in) you are right I want 20.
Clerk: How long you want them?
Hick: I’ll go ask my Brother (outside and back in) we want them for a long time we’re building a barn.
Instructor
Joined: Apr 2009
Posts: 112
Likes: 38
From: Central Fl
My grandfather took many chances with his Vette driving it very fast after a long lunch and a few beers at the VFW where he had been a member for nearly 60 years. His buddies said that he should slow down take things easy, "smell the roses", buy a Prius with good gas mileage.
He tried to slow down a bit and died peacefully in his sleep not like the passenger in his Vette who was heard screaming loud cussing words as the vehicle left the roadway.
He tried to slow down a bit and died peacefully in his sleep not like the passenger in his Vette who was heard screaming loud cussing words as the vehicle left the roadway.
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Intermediate
Joined: Sep 2012
Posts: 44
Likes: 0
From: Colorado Springs CO
Melting Slicks
Joined: Nov 2007
Posts: 3,475
Likes: 10
From: Wake Forest NC
How do two blondes get into their Corvette when they locked the key in the car?
One breaks the window and they both crawl in.
.
One breaks the window and they both crawl in.
.
Last edited by s'noJob; Oct 25, 2012 at 09:15 PM. Reason: added sig