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Figured it out, the feed wires from the driver headlight go to the low/high relays, the ground from the driver headlight goes to the low relay and the ground from the passenger headlight goes to the high relay. Then the fog lights are grounded directly to the chassis instead of the high beam filament to keep the high beam indicator light from turning on when the fog lights are only turned on.
Figured out the high beam problem, inline fuse was to lose in holder, crimped it down and works now!
BUT- my friend and I checked out everything we could with a DMM and the wiring diagram from the FSM, and still we could not get the driving lights to work with the new wiring. We can switch back to old wiring as a test, and it would work. He says the ground is really to the relay (we think is under the passenger side dash) and not the filament, that operates the driving lights and then runs to the filament. So we cannot get to the relay, so cannot change the ground.