A true redneck...
Burning Brakes
Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 952
Likes: 44
From: NC
Originally Posted by Bangkok Dean
A friend of somebody just moved from Southern California to South
Carolina and he e-mailed this. He said they gave it to him at the state line.> If you are going to live or visit in the South, you need to know
these rules.
1. That farm boy you see at the gas station did more work before breakfast than you do all week at the gym.
2. It's called a "gravel road." No matter how slow you drive, you're
going to get dust on your Navigator. Drive it or get out of the way.
3. The red dirt -- it's called clay. Red clay. If you like the color
don't wash your car for a couple weeks -- it'll be permanent.
4. We all started hunting and fishing when we were seven years old.
Yeah, we saw Bambi. We got over it.
5. Go ahead and bring your $600 Orvis Fly Rod. Don't cry to us if a
flathead breaks it off at the handle. We have a name for those little
13-inch trout you fish for -- bait.
6. Pull your pants up. You look like an idiot.
7. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of mallards are making
their final approach, we will shoot it. You might want to ensure it's not up to your ear at the time.
8. No, there's no "Vegetarian Special" on the menu. Order steak.
Order it rare. Or, you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the two
pounds of ham and turkey.
9. Tea - yeah, we have tea. It comes in a glass over ice and is
sweet. You want it hot -- sit it in the sun. You want it unsweetened -- add a lot of water.
10. You bring Coke into my house, it better be brown, wet, and served
over ice.
11. So you have a sixty thousand-dollar car. We're real impressed.
We have a quarter of a million-dollar combine that we only use two weeks a year.
12. Let's get this straight. We have one stoplight in town. We stop
when it's red. We may even stop when it's yellow.
13. We eat dinner together with our families. We pray before we eat
(yeah, even breakfast). We go to church on Wednesdays and Sundays
and we go to high school football games on Friday nights. We still address our seniors with "yes, sir" and "yes, ma'am," and we sometimes still take Sunday drives around town to see friends and neighbors.
14. We don't do "hurry up" well.
15. Greens - yeah, we have greens, but you don't putt on them. You
boil them with salty fatback, bacon or a ham hock.
16. Yeah, we eat catfish, bass, bream (pronounced brim) and carp.
You really want sushi and caviar? It's available at the bait shop.
17. They are pigs. That's what they smell like. Get over it. Don't
like it? Interstate 85 goes two ways - Interstate 40 goes the other two. Pick one.
18. Grits are corn. You put butter, salt, and maybe even some pepper
on them. If you want to put milk and sugar on them, then you want Cream of Wheat - go to Kansas. That would be I-40 west.
19. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season or dove
season. Both are holidays. You can get pancakes, cane syrup, and sausage before daylight at the church on either day.
20. So every person in every pickup waves? Yeah, it's called being
friendly. Understand the concept?
21. Yeah, we have golf courses. Don't hit in the water hazards. It
spooks the fish and bothers the gators - and if you hit it in the rough,we have these things called diamondbacks, and they're not baseball players.
22. That Highway Patrol Officer that just pulled you over for driving
like an idiot -- his name is "Sir," no matter how young he is.
23. We have lots of pine trees. They have sap. It drips from them.
You park your Navigator under them, and they'll leave a logo on your
hood.
24. You burn an American flag in our state, you get beat up. No
questions. The liberal contingent of our state legislature -- all
four of them -- enacted a measure to stop this. There is now a $2.50 fine for beating up the flag burner.
25. No, we don't care how you do things up North. If it is so great
Up there, why not visit a Northern state or stay there? And no, down
here, we don't have an accent, you do.
Carolina and he e-mailed this. He said they gave it to him at the state line.> If you are going to live or visit in the South, you need to know
these rules.
1. That farm boy you see at the gas station did more work before breakfast than you do all week at the gym.
2. It's called a "gravel road." No matter how slow you drive, you're
going to get dust on your Navigator. Drive it or get out of the way.
3. The red dirt -- it's called clay. Red clay. If you like the color
don't wash your car for a couple weeks -- it'll be permanent.
4. We all started hunting and fishing when we were seven years old.
Yeah, we saw Bambi. We got over it.
5. Go ahead and bring your $600 Orvis Fly Rod. Don't cry to us if a
flathead breaks it off at the handle. We have a name for those little
13-inch trout you fish for -- bait.
6. Pull your pants up. You look like an idiot.
7. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of mallards are making
their final approach, we will shoot it. You might want to ensure it's not up to your ear at the time.
8. No, there's no "Vegetarian Special" on the menu. Order steak.
Order it rare. Or, you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the two
pounds of ham and turkey.
9. Tea - yeah, we have tea. It comes in a glass over ice and is
sweet. You want it hot -- sit it in the sun. You want it unsweetened -- add a lot of water.
10. You bring Coke into my house, it better be brown, wet, and served
over ice.
11. So you have a sixty thousand-dollar car. We're real impressed.
We have a quarter of a million-dollar combine that we only use two weeks a year.
12. Let's get this straight. We have one stoplight in town. We stop
when it's red. We may even stop when it's yellow.
13. We eat dinner together with our families. We pray before we eat
(yeah, even breakfast). We go to church on Wednesdays and Sundays
and we go to high school football games on Friday nights. We still address our seniors with "yes, sir" and "yes, ma'am," and we sometimes still take Sunday drives around town to see friends and neighbors.
14. We don't do "hurry up" well.
15. Greens - yeah, we have greens, but you don't putt on them. You
boil them with salty fatback, bacon or a ham hock.
16. Yeah, we eat catfish, bass, bream (pronounced brim) and carp.
You really want sushi and caviar? It's available at the bait shop.
17. They are pigs. That's what they smell like. Get over it. Don't
like it? Interstate 85 goes two ways - Interstate 40 goes the other two. Pick one.
18. Grits are corn. You put butter, salt, and maybe even some pepper
on them. If you want to put milk and sugar on them, then you want Cream of Wheat - go to Kansas. That would be I-40 west.
19. The "Opener" refers to the first day of deer season or dove
season. Both are holidays. You can get pancakes, cane syrup, and sausage before daylight at the church on either day.
20. So every person in every pickup waves? Yeah, it's called being
friendly. Understand the concept?
21. Yeah, we have golf courses. Don't hit in the water hazards. It
spooks the fish and bothers the gators - and if you hit it in the rough,we have these things called diamondbacks, and they're not baseball players.
22. That Highway Patrol Officer that just pulled you over for driving
like an idiot -- his name is "Sir," no matter how young he is.
23. We have lots of pine trees. They have sap. It drips from them.
You park your Navigator under them, and they'll leave a logo on your
hood.
24. You burn an American flag in our state, you get beat up. No
questions. The liberal contingent of our state legislature -- all
four of them -- enacted a measure to stop this. There is now a $2.50 fine for beating up the flag burner.
25. No, we don't care how you do things up North. If it is so great
Up there, why not visit a Northern state or stay there? And no, down
here, we don't have an accent, you do.
Glad I can familiorize with every single one of those quotes.
James
Melting Slicks
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 2,441
Likes: 0
Uh Rah
December 9, 2005(CNN) While interviewing an anonymous US Special Forces soldier, a Reuters News agent asked the soldier what he felt when sniping members of Al Quaeda in Afghanistan. The soldier shrugged and replied, "Recoil."
You might be a red neck if you thought that was funny.
You might be a red neck if you thought that was funny.
Last edited by shafrs3; Jan 31, 2006 at 11:21 AM.
Race Director
Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 11,360
Likes: 382
From: Plano TX
You might be a redneck if you think that non christians can never be real Americans
You might be a redneck if you keep quoting the second amendment but have never heard of separation of church and state.
You might be a redneck if you think "supporting the troops" means you can't disagree with Bush
You might be a redneck if you won't accept different points of view.
You might be a redneck if you keep quoting the second amendment but have never heard of separation of church and state.
You might be a redneck if you think "supporting the troops" means you can't disagree with Bush
You might be a redneck if you won't accept different points of view.
Melting Slicks
Joined: Oct 2003
Posts: 2,300
Likes: 2
St. Jude Donor '08
Originally Posted by zwede
You might be a redneck if you think that non christians can never be real Americans
You might be a redneck if you keep quoting the second amendment but have never heard of separation of church and state.
You might be a redneck if you think "supporting the troops" means you can't disagree with Bush
You might be a redneck if you won't accept different points of view.
You might be a redneck if you keep quoting the second amendment but have never heard of separation of church and state.
You might be a redneck if you think "supporting the troops" means you can't disagree with Bush
You might be a redneck if you won't accept different points of view.
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Drifting
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 1,258
Likes: 0
From: Huntsville Alabama
Originally Posted by Jclgodale3
Full fledged here.
Here's my house and my business
Here's my house and my business
The above statement is in my the posters views and the corvetteforum takes no responsibility. seriously though i dont want to make anyone that might live in a small town mad. 
Melting Slicks
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 2,441
Likes: 0
Originally Posted by zwede
You might be a redneck if you think that non christians can never be real Americans
You might be a redneck if you keep quoting the second amendment but have never heard of separation of church and state.
You might be a redneck if you think "supporting the troops" means you can't disagree with Bush
You might be a redneck if you won't accept different points of view.
You might be a redneck if you keep quoting the second amendment but have never heard of separation of church and state.
You might be a redneck if you think "supporting the troops" means you can't disagree with Bush
You might be a redneck if you won't accept different points of view.
Last edited by shafrs3; Jan 31, 2006 at 01:58 PM.
Race Director
Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 11,360
Likes: 382
From: Plano TX
Originally Posted by shafrs3
You might be a red neck if you think most rednecks think like this.
Race Director
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 12,696
Likes: 329
From: Scottsdale Arizona
Originally Posted by Jughead
I think that'd be more of an American than redneck, or maybe it's the left pushing America that way.
I tend to agree, though I liked this post. It's good to be reminded now and then of what matters.
Pro
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 585
Likes: 0
From: Royal Oak MI
I got this yesterday,
DID YOU KNOW?
As you walk up the steps to the building which houses the
U.S. Supreme Court you can see near the top of the building a row of the world's law givers and each one is facing one in the middle who is
facing forward with a full frontal view . it is Moses and he is holding
the Ten Commandments!
DID YOU KNOW?
As you enter the Supreme Court courtroom, the two huge oak doors have the Ten Commandments engraved on each lower portion of each door.
DID YOU KNOW?
As you sit inside the courtroom, you can see the wall,
right above where the Supreme Court judges sit,
a display of the Ten Commandments!
DID YOU KNOW?
There are Bible verses etched in stone all over the Federal Buildings
and Monuments in Washington, D.C.
DID YOU KNOW?
James Madison, the fourth president, known as "The Father of Our
Constitution" made the following statement:
"We have staked the whole of all our political institutions upon the
capacity of mankind for self-government, upon the capacity of each and all of us to govern ourselves, to control ourselves, to sustain
ourselves according to the Ten Commandments of God."
DID YOU KNOW?
Patrick Henry, that patriot and Founding Father of our country said
"It cannot be emphasized too strongly or too often that this great
nation was founded not by religionists but by Christians, not on
religions but on the Gospel of Jesus Christ".
DID YOU KNOW?
Every session of Congress begins with a prayer by a paid preacher, whose salary has been paid by the taxpayer since 1777.
DID YOU KNOW?
Fifty-two of the 55 founders of the Constitution were members of the
established orthodox churches in the colonies.
DID YOU KNOW?
Thomas Jefferson worried that the Courts would overstep their authority and instead of interpreting the law would begin making law . an oligarchy the rule of few over many.
DID YOU KNOW?
The very first Supreme Court Justice, John Jay, said:
"Americans should select and prefer Christians as their rulers."
How, then, have we gotten to the point that everything we have done for 220 years in this country is now suddenly wrong and unconstitutional?
Lets put it around the world and let the world see and remember what
this great country was built on.
It is said that 86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore, it is very
hard to understand why there is such a mess about having the Ten
Commandments on display or "In God We Trust" on our money and having God in the Pledge of Allegiance.
DID YOU KNOW?
As you walk up the steps to the building which houses the
U.S. Supreme Court you can see near the top of the building a row of the world's law givers and each one is facing one in the middle who is
facing forward with a full frontal view . it is Moses and he is holding
the Ten Commandments!
DID YOU KNOW?
As you enter the Supreme Court courtroom, the two huge oak doors have the Ten Commandments engraved on each lower portion of each door.
DID YOU KNOW?
As you sit inside the courtroom, you can see the wall,
right above where the Supreme Court judges sit,
a display of the Ten Commandments!
DID YOU KNOW?
There are Bible verses etched in stone all over the Federal Buildings
and Monuments in Washington, D.C.
DID YOU KNOW?
James Madison, the fourth president, known as "The Father of Our
Constitution" made the following statement:
"We have staked the whole of all our political institutions upon the
capacity of mankind for self-government, upon the capacity of each and all of us to govern ourselves, to control ourselves, to sustain
ourselves according to the Ten Commandments of God."
DID YOU KNOW?
Patrick Henry, that patriot and Founding Father of our country said
"It cannot be emphasized too strongly or too often that this great
nation was founded not by religionists but by Christians, not on
religions but on the Gospel of Jesus Christ".
DID YOU KNOW?
Every session of Congress begins with a prayer by a paid preacher, whose salary has been paid by the taxpayer since 1777.
DID YOU KNOW?
Fifty-two of the 55 founders of the Constitution were members of the
established orthodox churches in the colonies.
DID YOU KNOW?
Thomas Jefferson worried that the Courts would overstep their authority and instead of interpreting the law would begin making law . an oligarchy the rule of few over many.
DID YOU KNOW?
The very first Supreme Court Justice, John Jay, said:
"Americans should select and prefer Christians as their rulers."
How, then, have we gotten to the point that everything we have done for 220 years in this country is now suddenly wrong and unconstitutional?
Lets put it around the world and let the world see and remember what
this great country was built on.
It is said that 86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore, it is very
hard to understand why there is such a mess about having the Ten
Commandments on display or "In God We Trust" on our money and having God in the Pledge of Allegiance.
Race Director
Joined: Sep 1999
Posts: 11,360
Likes: 382
From: Plano TX
Originally Posted by 72-LT1
I got this yesterday,
DID YOU KNOW?
[BIG snip of religious stuff]
How, then, have we gotten to the point that everything we have done for 220 years in this country is now suddenly wrong and unconstitutional?
Lets put it around the world and let the world see and remember what
this great country was built on.
It is said that 86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore, it is very
hard to understand why there is such a mess about having the Ten
Commandments on display or "In God We Trust" on our money and having God in the Pledge of Allegiance.
DID YOU KNOW?
[BIG snip of religious stuff]
How, then, have we gotten to the point that everything we have done for 220 years in this country is now suddenly wrong and unconstitutional?
Lets put it around the world and let the world see and remember what
this great country was built on.
It is said that 86% of Americans believe in God. Therefore, it is very
hard to understand why there is such a mess about having the Ten
Commandments on display or "In God We Trust" on our money and having God in the Pledge of Allegiance.
Edit: Fact check: God was added to the pledge of allegiance in the 1940's. Before that it was non-religious like it should be. You shouldn't have to subscribe to a certain mythology in order to be American.
Last edited by zwede; Jan 31, 2006 at 04:20 PM.
Melting Slicks
Joined: Dec 2005
Posts: 2,441
Likes: 0
I know there is a God, here are a few others that do too...
Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.
- Albert Einstein, in The New Convergence
Not only does God play dice, but... he sometimes throws them where they cannot be seen.
- Stephen W. Hawking
Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mystical. It is the source of all true art and science.
- Albert Einstein
Cease from practice based on intellectual understanding, pursuing words, and following after speech, and learn the backward step that turns your light inward to illuminate your self. Body and mind of themselves will drop away, and your original face will be manifest.
- Dogen
I can see, and that is why I can be happy, in what you call the dark, but which to me is golden. I can see a God-made world, not a manmade world.
- Helen Keller
Everything you see has its roots in the unseen world. The forms may change, yet the essence remains the same. Every wonderful sight will vanish; every sweet word will fade, But do not be disheartened, The source they come from is eternal, growing, Branching out, giving new life and new joy. Why do you weep? The source is within you And this whole world is springing up from it.
- Jelauddin Rumi
All speech, action, and behavior are fluctuations of consciousness. All life emerges from, and is sustained in, consciousness. The whole universe is the expression of consciousness. The reality of the universe is one unbounded ocean of consciousness in motion.
- Maharishi Mahesh Yogi
I want to know how God created this world. I am not interested in this or that phenomenon, in the spectrum of this or that element. I want to know His thoughts; the rest are details.
- Albert Einstein
All matter originates and exists only by virtue of a force… We must assume behind this force the existence of a conscious and intelligent Mind. This Mind is the matrix of all matter.
- Max Planck, Nobel Prize-winning Father of Quantum Theory
Mind and intelligence are woven into the fabric of our universe in a way that altogether surpasses our understanding.
- Freeman Dyson
The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes.
- William James
Zwede, from what I've read of your posts, you strike me as a thoughtful soul, not afraid of using your head. I thought maybe you'd like to read some famous quotes from other thoughtful souls.
Science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.
- Albert Einstein, in The New Convergence
Not only does God play dice, but... he sometimes throws them where they cannot be seen.
- Stephen W. Hawking
Our scientific power has outrun our spiritual power. We have guided missiles and misguided men.
- Martin Luther King, Jr.
The most beautiful thing we can experience is the mystical. It is the source of all true art and science.
- Albert Einstein
Cease from practice based on intellectual understanding, pursuing words, and following after speech, and learn the backward step that turns your light inward to illuminate your self. Body and mind of themselves will drop away, and your original face will be manifest.
- Dogen
I can see, and that is why I can be happy, in what you call the dark, but which to me is golden. I can see a God-made world, not a manmade world.
- Helen Keller
Everything you see has its roots in the unseen world. The forms may change, yet the essence remains the same. Every wonderful sight will vanish; every sweet word will fade, But do not be disheartened, The source they come from is eternal, growing, Branching out, giving new life and new joy. Why do you weep? The source is within you And this whole world is springing up from it.
- Jelauddin Rumi
All speech, action, and behavior are fluctuations of consciousness. All life emerges from, and is sustained in, consciousness. The whole universe is the expression of consciousness. The reality of the universe is one unbounded ocean of consciousness in motion.
- Maharishi Mahesh Yogi
I want to know how God created this world. I am not interested in this or that phenomenon, in the spectrum of this or that element. I want to know His thoughts; the rest are details.
- Albert Einstein
All matter originates and exists only by virtue of a force… We must assume behind this force the existence of a conscious and intelligent Mind. This Mind is the matrix of all matter.
- Max Planck, Nobel Prize-winning Father of Quantum Theory
Mind and intelligence are woven into the fabric of our universe in a way that altogether surpasses our understanding.
- Freeman Dyson
The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitudes.
- William James
Zwede, from what I've read of your posts, you strike me as a thoughtful soul, not afraid of using your head. I thought maybe you'd like to read some famous quotes from other thoughtful souls.
Last edited by shafrs3; Jan 31, 2006 at 04:58 PM.
Pro
Joined: Nov 2004
Posts: 585
Likes: 0
From: Royal Oak MI
Originally Posted by zwede
Why? Because when you let religion rule a country you end up with a theocracy... Good example being Iran. Not a society I would like... Something I always wondered is why Christians have this need to force their views on other people. You're a Christian, I'm an Agnostic. Why do you feel you have the right to tell me what I should believe in?
Edit: Fact check: God was added to the pledge of allegiance in the 1940's. Before that it was non-religious like it should be. You shouldn't have to subscribe to a certain mythology in order to be American.
Edit: Fact check: God was added to the pledge of allegiance in the 1940's. Before that it was non-religious like it should be. You shouldn't have to subscribe to a certain mythology in order to be American.
Melting Slicks
Joined: Feb 2003
Posts: 3,053
Likes: 4
St. Jude Donor '03,'11
Originally Posted by zwede
You're a Christian, I'm an Agnostic. Why do you feel you have the right to tell me what I should believe in?